zippie

this morning about 3am i got the shit scared out of me, I was driving in dense fog, so thick you could not really see the road, then a truck comes flying by me going 80 maybe? then i guess he thought the road went straight when it turned, if he was going slower he would have known this, too late he turned his wheel and flipped his truck on the side, sparks flew all over my truck as i locked the breaks trying to slow down with out running directly into it, causing me to skid sideways for a just a moment before getting things under control and slowed down, his truck continued down the road catching fire and both the truck and trailer caught fire, as it came to a stop.

i ran to the truck to try and get the driver out and could see the faint outline of a womans face through the windshield just before the entire cab burst into flames. i wish there was something i could have done to save her, but there was simply no time. and the fire was so hot you could not get close.

after talking with the police and telling them what happened they just sent me on my way...
how the fuck can you just send me on my way? i can't really think right now, but i have to go drive to Ohio now, I'm still shaking. I think i cried for the first time in a while.

sorry to those of you who i did not reply to this morning, I was not in the mood to talk to anyone

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I often wonder why I so easily fall in love with every woman that is the least bit nice to me, is another love really what i need?  Perhaps simply being alone is the best way to deal with this sad world we live in.  Falling in love has never brought me nothing but heart ache and pain.  The main problem is people are so dishonest about their feelings,  maybe not at first but when things start to go wrong there simply is never any communication to let the other party know things have turned bad.  I don't see why every relationship I've had has ended so horribly, I'm not that bad of a guy, while I know I'm not the smartest guy out here, I'm not the dumbest either, I mean I read, which is more than i can say for most.  all I've ever really asked for in a relationship was just for someone to care enough to ask me how my day went,  seems most everyone only cares about their selves, and seek that attention,  which I feel it should be a two way street on that, while I love for nothing more than someone to listen to me, I love to listen as well.  another thing i don't get is why the last few women I've dated have left me for abusive men,  I really feel now that the saying where nice guys finish last has never been more true.  but oh well, maybe one day someone will appreciate someone being nice :)

cheers.